step-motherhood.

it's hard to believe how much one kid can affect you.

today, michael and i drove to cleveland to kamryn's "meet the teacher" event at her new school. lots of things were going through my head as we walked up the sidewalk to the primary school. when i met kamryn, she was only two years old. she was potty training. she woke up in the middle of the night and crawled in bed with her daddy. she was a baby. but when she skipped up tonight to smother us in hugs, she was 100% kindergarten big-girl. when we got into the classroom, it was, of course, a sight. it's not particularly common to see a blended family attending "meet the teacher night" in peace, but to kamryn, we are her family and she is not ashamed. the teacher, mrs. griffin, said, "who's the mom?" as tracy extended her hand for a shake, kamryn said pointing, "and this is my daddy...my step-mom...and my step-dad." everyone acknowledged that it's great to have two mommies and two daddies and that it just means more love for kamryn. oh, how i wish i could climb into that little brain of hers to see what's really going on in there. as her mom and michael filled out the paperwork, and chris chatted with some buddies, kamryn and i made our way around the room to see what there was to see. she settled at the kitchen center where she made toast and coffee for me while i waited at the peter rabbit table. (she assured me i wouldn't break the chairs because "they're plastic".) they put away her supplies and we said goodbye and thank you to mrs. griffin and we left. we were able to take kamryn out to dinner and she requested "the dugout grill". michael asked her if they had juicy hot dogs (a fav of hers), and she said, "juicy hot dogs AND warm peanuts!" so we went. apparently no one is in a hurry in cleveland, oklahoma, so it took us longer to get our food than to eat it, but it was fun watching her bust the peanuts with her hands and pretend the shells were snowboards for her fingers. i can't believe how she is growing and changing so fast. some of the things she says are priceless! like tonight, she was judo chopping peanuts at dinner. she held one up and said, "look how damaged it is!" damaged?? wow. anyway, we also asked her what she is looking forward to the most about kindergarten. her response was, "the sharp crayons," and i thought, sheesh! if i knew that's all she cared about i would've bought her a box long ago. but i guess it's the simple things in life that make the biggest difference to us. we ended the night by taking her back to her house. she, of course, wanted us to go in and check out her room. i'm not sure how momma tracy felt about it, but we went in anyway and had a pretty good chat. chris was especially friendly to michael, which i think was a good thing. i think the more kamryn sees us positively interacting the better. she didn't want us to go, or wanted to come home with us. it's hard to leave like that, but we assured her that daddy would pick her up on friday for a fun weekend. and we sent her back in for a bath and bedtime because the first day of school is a very important day for a kid, especially when she has a new dress and shoes to show off. =] but i found myself leaving with a different attitude than ever before. this is our life and we are her parents, full or step, mom or dad...she's ours and we have a responsibilty to teach her and love her and be there for her no matter what our differences might be. and i want to do that with my whole heart.